Let's face it! Satan is a punk.
I was going to give that last statement an exclamation point, but it looked entirely too exciting and he doesn't deserve that. The enemy is anything but fun.
The first few days of my break he tried to fill my mind with thoughts of worthlessness and incapability when it comes to teaching. Thankfully I caught on quickly to his schemes. To let him ruin my week of rest and recooperation would be silly.
Yesterday and today he has tried to fill my mind with other doubts towards where I stand with Jesus.
It's as if satan has a checklist... Starting with where you are and then moving down to older struggles if the current one doesn't work.
I don't have scripture or anything to back that up, but I know that's how it seems in my own life. Amazingly i've caught on and learned to fight.
But i'm not always successful.
Tonight I was feeling extremely beaten, so I decided to look back through my blog posts for proof of Jesus in my life.
January is packed full. But it's neat to glance even further back just a month before.
And so i'm thankful... thankful for blogger; my online journal. For evidence of Him.
Thank you for technology and the ability to quickly type something and be able to look at it later. I needed to see proof tonight. Jesus, I don't even know where to begin when it comes to praying tonight. So i'll just say thank You and ask that you not only mentally prepare me for tomorrow, but in all other aspects as well... prepare my heart. I don't want to simply be thankful on Thanksgiving or in the month of November. Will You change my heart? Will You give me a thankful heart? A heart that embraces every moment and opportunity and realizes all that I am blessed with in this life. I need You. Sometimes I just want to go outside and scream - I need You, Jesus. I love You... even when I fail to show it.