Changes

We got to work Monday morning thinking something was going to be shared as far as changes for next year.

-Who is moving to the low school and leaving our family at Crockett?

Never did we realize that more changes lie just around the corner.

As it turned out, we didn't get to find anything out on Monday. Before I left work that day my best friend (my favorite team-mate on first grade... I call her my bestfriend at work) and I stopped by the principal's office to vent and see if we could find out any news.

We were both given a hint that we were going to be fine and to be honest I was given a hint before from another friend who always knows the info before it's shared. My principal had told me a few weeks earlier that he said he more than likely wasn't going to take a first year teacher because it wouldn't be fair to that person. They just got comfortable and went through a very new, stressful year and then you pluck them from that and move them into a brand-new environment to have basically another first year again. Those words as well made me feel like I had nothing to worry about.

Tuesday rolls around and the principal from the low school walks into the office as i'm standing there. I think I smiled... not real sure.... and then laid my head on the counter when she walked into my principal's office and shut the door.

And the door remained shut for almost two hours.

It was killing us. Finally my best friend at work went to the assistant principal and asked her if we were going to find anything out and she said.... yes.

We continued to wait until almost 3 o' clock that afternoon when the news was finally out.

I was fine and my best friend were fine just like the hint we had recieved earlier.

but

not the fine that I expected.

My best friend at work pulled me into her classroom and shared more changes. She was being moved to Second Grade. And while that's still on the same campus, it's NOT the same as being on the same team. I wasn't just losing one team member to a completely different school, I was losing my favorite team member to a completely different team on the other side of campus. I immediately started crying. If things weren't crazy enough to begin with that just made me want to shut down and cry. I felt like our team was just being ripped apart.

All I could say in that moment was why? And her response was it was either me or you Megan and I couldn't do that to you after your first year. So either way we were going to be seperated. I respect and thank her for stepping up to the plate. Then she also shared with me that my principal fought for me to stay at Crockett because I was on the list to go to the low school.

Once again, I stood there completely shocked. Like when is all this going to stop? I felt like I had been hit by a bus. All along I was taking the hints and thinking that I had NOTHING to worry about when truly all of this stuff was going on behind the scenes that I had no idea about. Something about that got me. It just got me and I couldn't let it go. I felt emotionally shocked.

I pulled myself together for a little bit, but when I walked into my mom's office I lost it. I knew that ultimately I was going to be okay, it was just in that moment too much information... shocking information.

Even in this seemingly unimportant time of pruning and trials, God is
preparing me for the next step. This "getting ready period" is not a waste of
time. It is an important part of fulfilling my calling. Though I can't see much
fruit, God is getting my branches ready and healthy enough to hold all He knows
is coming.

I remembered this quote from last summer and it made me think. I thought losing my job altogether was going to be worse case scenario and pretty tough, but as it turns out, staying is going to be pretty tough as well. Change isn't easy, but change requires you to trust everything to the Lord. He is our portion. And He is constantly getting us ready and healthy enough to hold all He knows is coming.

The Megan a few years back would never be standing solid through all these changes. And I just have to say Praise The Lord. All of those trials that I went through in college were preparing me for the many changes I would face, all the unknowns of growing up. And although they are hard, I love knowing that I can always (no matter where I am) lean on the rock and firmness of Jesus Christ. He does have my best interest at mind.

And He knows what is coming
He knows what I will become....


To You be the glory. Jesus Christ.