Friday, May 20, 2011

The Constant One

Well, i'm sittin' tight and pretty right now. I think the stress and deadlines at the end of the year have kinda taken my eyes off the fact that I am losing my little family of kiddos in my classroom.

Even though I "don't have favorites" there are definitely some that are wayyyy harder to let go than others. I held in the tears when I put them in the car, squeezing and letting the hug linger a little longer than usual.

It felt good to know that I could "come over for swim days or to go to the beach".... HAHA!!! :)

I felt like I have been in a tunnel all day long.

Your first year is a hard year, but it's also a special year... one that you will never forget. You are fresh out of the gate with tons of energy and passion to keep you going. I guess there is part of me that is sad that this year is over and i'm no longer "first year" anymore. But God is good and He will continually be my passion and drive.

I stood in my classroom starring into space, reliving all the little things we've done all year. I kept envisioning repetitive things that were in our daily routine. That's when it gets emotional.

I am just drained all the way around.

We are like fruit basket turn overs right now on our campus because almost everybody is moving to a new classroom to try and have our layout "make sense". Right now half of third grade is on the other side of the campus than the rest of their team. It's going to be completely chaotic moving that many teachers and all their belongings. I am excited about the possibility of getting to decorate and re-arrange a new room. That's always fun, but for now it's a bit stressful packing things up.

Last night I posted the entry from April that let you know I was safe and had a job. Lots has happened since then. We were told that one teacher per grade level would be moving to the lowest school in town to try and strengthen that campus. While I want to think that he will not take me with my lack of years, I still don't want to get excited too soon.

It's been pretty sad around our campus because we are all so close. Most of the teachers have been there for years and have become a tight-knit family. It's not easy to think about losing a member of that team.

As it is right now we still know nothing. And who knows when we'll find out. Administration knows, but isn't letting the news out yet..... that's just hubba jubba.

So be in prayer for all the changes that are happening at our school next year. It's definitely keeping me on my toes and keeping me clinging to Jesus. He is the only constant.

All my changes come from Him, He who never changes.
I'm held firm in the grasp of the Rock of all the ages.
All is well with my soul.
He is God in control.
I know not all His plans, but I know I am in His hands.

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