So.... i'm taking a day tomorrow.
I didn't really have much of an option. My mother who is on the same campus as me, plus the principal and many other experienced teachers told me that I needed to take a day. A mental health day.
That sounds excellent. sarcasm.
Anything with mental health in the sentence just doesn't sound thrilling to me.
They tried to make me take last Friday and I very firmly told them that I did not need it. I should have listened to them because on Wednesday I was so stressed out that I don't really remember walking from the car line to my classroom. That is some stress.
I came home that evening, slept, spent some time in the Word, and then planned absolutely nothing for my class on Thursday. I felt revived and refreshed and it was amazing.
Really i'm fine, but I know it's wise to listen to the people who have taken this extremely challenging road of teaching your first year.
It's like running a marathon. You are running 3 miles, so in your mind you think, I just gotta keep going and i'll make 13 miles. Except for the fact that your body doesn't work that way. You get to a point and you hit a wall and you literally cannot go anymore. You have to have off days where you let your body recoup and then you have to slowly work your way up to running the full distance.
So i'm home tomorrow. And I might drive myself up the wall.
I miss my kids already. They frustrate me and challenge me and test my patience and make me want to scream at times, but leaving them with another individual completely makes me anxious and makes me want to go hug them and tell them how much I love them. I'm a nerd, yes, I know.
Finding the words to explain all that i'm feeling wouldn't really be possible. Some wonderful feelings, some completely overwhelming and not so wonderful. I just want to say thank you, once again, to those of you who are praying for me this year. God has truly been in control of this year; never having an education class in college, yet teaching my first year.... it's truly a miracle from Him!
I'm off to rest... and to make myself - be still.
Be still and know that He is God. Psalm 46:10