I lived so much of my life knowing things about God.
He is the healer. He is peace. He is all-powerful. He is comfort. He is joy. He is love.
The phrase "this year was just different" has come out of my mouth more than people probably want to hear.
Why was it different?
Because I didn't just know things about God..... I believed Him.
And now I don't want to forget that different.
This year was the year of believing. I believed that He could use any and every part of my life (flat out rebellious mistakes and all). I believed that He could lift the fear of relationships/marriage and even fulfill every desire that I may have in a husband (even specifics). I believed that when I said the name of Jesus in the midst of anxiety and fear that His powerful name could give peace to my mind, soul, and heart. I believed that I did not have to worry about anything.... even finding a job that I had little experience in and being successful at it. I believed that He loved me... unconditionally... no matter what I felt... I believed.
Lord Jesus, there were many moments this year that I can think back on and I felt so close to you and so strong and secure that nothing could shake me. How I long to never forget what that felt like and to never stop believing. You have told us that we will have hard times in this life and that it won't always be easy, but You also promise that You are with us and that in Your time You'll use all things for our good and Your glory. This week is one of those weeks where I wish I could flash back in time and rest in that place again, but I know that even in the hard times you are there. Will You be my portion today... my faith... my belief... Will you get me out of the way and do what You are wanting to do? Here's to increasing faith and living wide open in 2011. Have Your way... Jesus.