a thankful heart.

the lesson in sunday school today was about The Lord's Supper and what it means to us as believers.... it's always interesting for me when i'm studying the lessons... the things that usually get to me are things i already know, but for some reason just by changing the order of words will change your whole mindset of it all. I teach Junior High Girls so it's probably the fact that it's brought down to a lower level, ha. We talked about how people will go to great lengths to be remembered after they pass away, but God gave us the ultimate way for remembering Him. On the day He was betrayed, He had supper with His disciples..... From that moment on any time they broke bread they would remember the painful sacrifice that Christ went through.... all because He loves us and desires to have a relationship with us. We talked about how we need to prepare our hearts before we partake in the Lord's Supper, it's a sacred time. We need to let go of all the bitterness and forgive where ever it needs to be given... we need to have a truly thankful heart. It's not just something that we need to be thankful for and remember on the days that we do take the Lord supper, it should be the very cry of our hearts.... from the depths of our beings we should be so grateful for all that Christ has done, continues to do, and will do. We will never comprehend the love that the Father has for us.... it's too overwhelming! I want to be thankful, truly truly thankful.... i want to feel it as i worship Him, i want it to be REAL and i want Him to accept it as worship. He knows the truth motives of our hearts, i want to get mine right and to be GENUINELY grateful.

We had the AWANA Awards ceremony tonight at church. It went very smoothly and turned out great. Afterwards we had a little fellowship with all the awana leaders, parents and kids.... we ate some food and chatted :) I got the priviledge of hanging out with Ardyn, Ash, and Mari Alice which i havent had in a LONG time. It was fun! We picked out what we liked to eat, we found a comfy place on the floor, sat down and shared food (Ash picked off my plate ha)!!! I love them!

After church i invited some college girl friends to come over and play Rock Band - they accepted. I was very proud of myself after i realized what i did.... YOU, Megan Elease just invited people over to hang out, without even thinking or hesitating.... Go You! haha We had a good time! Then i went up to the dorm and stayed for about 2 hours just hanging out in their rooms. I still prefer to be at home though! ha I will make it through this though.

I am only suppose to worry about today, actually not even WORRY about today, just take it one day at a time. Give God my ALL and then leave the results up to Him. So that is what i am learning to do. I love growth.... it's painful, but the days that you can actually see how far you've come make the hard days worth it.

The more I seek the Father, the more i will know Him, the more i will recognize Him, and the more i will fall in love with Him..... and i can't wait!

The weekend is over and it's the last full week of school. sigh.... a sigh of relief that is!!!


Father i come to you now thanking you for who you are! Keep us mindful of all that you've done for us.. let our lives and hearts cry out to you for how grateful we truly are. Break our hearts for whatever is in our lives that doesn't need to be there. Open us up and reveal things to us Father. I don't want to just get by anymore, i want to know you and do whatever it takes to get there. Show me your truth and help me to stand firm in that. Thank you for life, i want you to be my life Father. Continue to be with Iona, Diane, Cari, James, Josh, and everyone else that is affected by this event God. Help them as they plan things, and as they go through this time of grieving.... you tell us in your word that there is a time for everything, help them to mourn and deal with it properly Father. Wrap your arms around them and may they become closer to you through all of this. I love You. I need You. me.