Proverbs 31 Woman

The electricity went off in the middle of the night last night, it was approximately 4:30... the noise of everything electrical shutting off woke me up. It seemed extremely dark, it bothered me... i layed there saying the name of Jesus over and over to try and calm myself enough to go back to sleep. As i was laying there i was reminded of how God calls us to be the light in the darkness.... i remember Beth Moore talking about the pilgrims walking to the feasts of the Lord with the light of their lanterns guiding their way..... even the tiniest light will carry so far in complete darkness. If there was a flat surface covering miles and miles, that one lantern or candle could be seen for many miles. Yet last night, in complete utter darkness, i couldn't even see an inch infront of my face..... Darkness - physically, spiritually, emotionally - is a scary place to be.

when i opened my beth moore book this morning, i was amazed at the verse of the day....
If we walk in the light as He Himself is in the light, we have fellowship with one another. 1 John 1:7

This God of ours, He's a goofy fella isn't He.... haha. He never ceases to amaze me!!!

I was excited that the weekend was here, Saturday mornings mean SLEEPING IN. although, i'm so use to getting up every morning that my routine interupted my sleeping in. I woke up, spent some time with the Lord and went for a jog.... i have now ran some errands for my mom, made some lunch and am waiting until 5 o' clock to get here. Tonight i am babysitting for the Halls - i find myself again with another opportunity to work with children.... wondering what the Lord is trying to show me, what desires He is planting in my heart.

I have read Proverbs 31, The Wife of Noble Character, many times this week.... my heart longs to be that some day! But being that Woman doesn't start the day that i meet my husband, get married and have a family.... Becoming that woman of God is an everyday journey... for me it is truly taking place right now.... Everyday i wake up i find myself desiring to know the Lord, to genuinely give my heart and soul to Him in everything that i do.... I have had to come to terms with myself and realize that i may not get married until i'm 25 or later.... it's not neccesarily what I want, but i dont want what i want - i want to completely fall in LOVE with God and the way He intended for things to be.... He does know what i need, and His timing is PERFECT - so if that means waiting patiently and trusting in Him for how ever long He has planned, then i want to do that.... faithfully, genuinely, wholeheartedly...... But as i journey and wait - i am becoming this Woman -

I dont want to be decieved or fooled by physical appearences, attractive winning ways, or charming words... i want something in me to be so attracted and desiring of this person in a way that i can't explain... then realize that it's the mans character - who he is in God that is drawing me to him in a way that i have never felt before. I want God's desires to envelop me, take me over, amaze me....

Here are a few verses that i like from this passage....

A Wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life... she works with eager hands... She gets up while it is still dark; she provides for her family... she works vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks... and her lamp does not go out at night. She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.... Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

i love you Father!